How to Respond to Your Pregnant Partner's Emotions

I've shared this before, but it's worth repeating that my pregnancies have been emotional roller coasters, fraught with emotional outbursts. They were rough experiences for me as well as those around me, and especially those closest to me. So, especially difficult on my partner, Jason. During one outburst last year, when he was trying to be helpful, I actually yelled at him, "You're not being helpful at all!"

When he asked what he could do to be helpful, it just frustrated me further. I was so upset that I couldn't think straight and I certainly couldn't feed him the right lines. I eventually calmed down enough to express that thought and to tell him that he was going to have to be resourceful and figure it out on his own. I encouraged him to talk to his friends or google some resources.

Saved by the Poop

The other day I was talking to my mom on the phone and our conversation became heated. We were arguing over the message of a particular news story and, suffice to say, we had two completely different perspectives. It may be helpful to explain that, while my mom and I have a LOT in common, political views are not one of the commonalities.

I was becoming so frustrated that I was close to saying something that would just be hurtful or to hanging up the phone. Exactly one moment before it came to that, Laurel had a big, loud poop. I was sure that it was a blow-out, and I was saved!

Get Gentle by Asking Questions

Question mark by Marco Bellucci, cc license

I keep coming across this concept of being curious as an alternative to being judgmental. It keeps popping up in what I’m reading, conversations with friends, and podcasts. It’s almost as if the universe is trying to send me a message. So, okay universe, you have my attention.

It really is a great idea, to be curious about our own quirks or the behavior and motives of others, rather than judging and reacting. I’ve been developing my toolbox of strategies to be more gentle in trying situations, and I thought curiosity would be a wonderful tool to add. I thought that at the next opportunity, I would simply remind myself to be curious and notice what was happening, rather than judge and react. I didn’t really think that one through.